


It's Not Easy Being Green

by lunarknightz



Series: Hulk Incorporated [1]
Category: The Avengers (2012), Thor (2011)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-16
Updated: 2012-06-16
Packaged: 2017-11-07 20:46:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,204
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/435265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lunarknightz/pseuds/lunarknightz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Darcy knew there were risks involved in working for SHIELD, but she never expected this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's Not Easy Being Green

Darcy was amazed at all the paperwork she had to fill out in order to work for SHIELD. She’d been expecting a bunch, because, hello, government, but really. She’d filled out forms for almost happening or eventuality, signing away her rights to sue SHIELD, the United States government or even Stark Industries.  


So Darcy signed away her life happily, knowing that it was easier than filling out a stack of a million job applications that would most likely go nowhere. Here, she’d be continuing on as Jane’s assistant, and actually getting paid. Songs on I-Tunes didn’t buy themselves (though Darcy was pretty sure that Tony could come up with some kind of app that could do that). 

She couldn’t say that she didn’t know there were risks involved with SHIELD. And yeah, she didn’t read that entire stack of paperwork as carefully as she should have. Maybe. 

But she was pretty sure that this consequence wasn’t mentioned on any form.

Seriously, who could have seen this coming?

 

__________

 

Darcy was almost killed by Mole Man. _Mole Man_. A man with the power of a rodent. Really. He was like the lamest of the lame villains bouncing around the universe and calling out superheroes. He wasn’t cunning like Loki, or mutated by the Lizard, or kinda scary like Doctor Doom. And he wasn’t even one of the Avengers regular villains. 

One day, Mole Man had tunneled in to Jane’s lab, and started wrecking havoc. Not only did he destroy a lot of important data and equipment, he also threw a frigging telescoping spear straight into Darcy’s abdomen.

She was in shock after it hit- Darcy could hardly feel it. Was that good? Darcy looked down at her chest.

“But..we were gonna get cupcakes after work.” She complained, and then promptly passed out.

 

________

 

Darcy pulled through. It had been close…too close for comfort. Steve and Clint arrived not long after Darcy passed out, thanks to Jane’s quick thinking and pushing the Villain Attack Panic Button that Tony had installed in the lab. They made quick work of the mole, and transported Darcy quickly upstairs to the state of the art Med Lab a few floors up.

Tony and Bruce had been doing some research when the burst in with the hurt Darcy. Bruce sprung into action, his experience in being a field doctor a plus. 

“She’s lost a lot of blood.” He assessed, after getting the spear out. “I think we’re going to need a transfusion.” 

“Do we have extra blood?” Tony asked.

“With this many people in a high risk work zone? It would be irresponsible if we didn’t.”

Clint went over to the database, and found out Darcy’s blood type, and announced it. 

“That’s a rare blood type.” Bruce sighed. “I’ve got some in my fridge.”

“You keep blood in your fridge?” Tony scowled. “What are you, secretly wishing to become a great big green jolly sparklepire?”

“It’s for science.” Bruce frowned.

“Whatever.” Tony sighed. “I’ll go grab the blood.”

“Hang in there, Darcy.” Steve said, holding her hand, even though she wasn’t conscious. “You’ll pull through.”

_____

Pull through she did. After a few weeks of resting and a little physical therapy she was back to her normal self again. And Darcy was on a mission.

“I want my I-Pod back.” She frowned, glaring up at Nick Fury. “It was taken mistakenly with your monkeys all of our precious Thor Wikipedia knowledge, and it still hasn’t been given back. Not having it is seriously damaging my calm.”

“Ms. Lewis,” Fury frowned. “I told you before. I’ve put in a call, but after critical losses within the organization including the base where we held the tesseract and the personnel of Agent Coulson, a personal electronic device is hardly high on our list of priorities.”

“But.” Darcy said, growing angry. “That I-pod was my personal property. Do you have any idea how much money and time is put into making playlists? And downloading album artwork and correcting names on files that I really shouldn’t have downloaded illegally?”

As Darcy talked, her anger grew. Her voice grew louder, and Darcy felt her focus shifting- almost as if Nick Fury was growing tiny.

“Ms. Lewis!” Fury’s voice took on a tone of calm. “Please, I can assure you that priorities can be changed. We can find your I-pod, or perhaps even put in a call to get you the latest model directly from Apple. Work with me. Stay calm.”

“Calm? I am calm.” She snapped.

“Ms. Lewis. Darcy. I’m afraid you’re not yourself at the moment. Look at your hands.”

Her hands weren’t her own. 

They were large.

And green.

The world suddenly went dark.

 

_____

 

Darcy pressed rewind. Again. She’d been holed up here in Bruce’s lab for hours, watching the experience over and over again.

“How are you?” Bruce said softly as he entered the room.

“Still trying to grasp that I have my own Mr. Hyde.” Darcy sighed. “I don’t understand. This isn’t some mutation, and I haven’t been exposed to any raditation- seriously, Jane is really careful. And wouldn’t she be going all Elphaba too?”

“I think we might have figured that out.” Bruce sighed. “When Mole Man attacked you, you lost a good amount of blood.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. And we gave you a blood transfusion. You have a rare type of blood.”

“What, was my blood donor Kermit the Frog or something?”

“No.” Bruce shook his head. “We gave you my blood.” He let out a deep sigh. “By accident.”

“Wait. What? Why would you give me your blood?”

“Believe it or not, we have the same blood type. I keep some blood of my own in a refrigerator in my lab for tests; along with some blood of the same type in case I’m in need of a transfusion myself. Tony went after the blood- and grabbed my blood instead of the transfusion blood.”

Darcy was silent for a moment. 

“So I’m like you? A She-Hulk or something?”

“I’m so sorry, Darcy.” Bruce said. “I know how terrible this is. I wouldn’t wish this on anyone.” He ran his fingers through his hair. “I’ve been trying to find a cure, and I promise you that I’ll do everything I can to find a cure. I’ll work even harder.”

“Can you help me?” She said softly. “I want to learn how to control this.”

“The first time I transformed I destroyed buildings. You’re already light years ahead of where I started.”

“Duh. I’m a woman.” Darcy cracked a tiny smile. 

“But of course. We’re in this together.” Bruce reached out and squeezed her hand. “We’re the only people in the universe that have a clue what this kind of transformation is like.”  
“You and me against the world, huh?”

“Pretty much, I guess.” 

“Who knows, if I get good enough at this, the Avengers could have a new member.” Darcy smiled. “Or we could start our own team. The Hulks…they get angry, and together they fight crime!”

Bruce smiled. He reached in his pocket and pulled out a wrapped package. “Oh, Fury gave me this to give to you.”

“My I-Pod!” Darcy unwrapped the item and smiled.. “Awesome.”


End file.
